by LittleLizzie

Take my hand if you dare, I'll lead you to place I'd rather not share.
Listen closely if you care, my voice shakes everytime I mention there.
Slip into my shoes and let me show you how it's like to be me.
From the moment I awake I hold my breath in hopes to not resurface his image.
I step out of bed and start seeing it anyway, all over again.
I swallow my pill and still feel internally ill.
I go about my routine staying busy hoping that the residual gross will soon leave me.
A moment to myself and his voice becomes too loud.
I count down until it's time to take the next dose. Little hope but here it goes.
By now it's only midday, so many hours left until my night medication.
"Don't dwell don't dwell" I repeat to myself.
It's hard because my whole life I never knew of anything else. I've never dreamed easy dreams. I could only remember what happened to me. In the basement. On the couch. Behind his locked door. It's stuck in my head.
I don't wish this on anyone let alone a child!
How many hours will it be until that feeling tells me not to breathe?
How many minutes until my skin becomes relentless?
How many nights will I steal before again it all feels real?
How much can I say before the visions get in my way?
Now it is almost that time,
The only way I survive is the medication that makes me close my eyes at night.
Without them, I'm too filled with fright.
I can't simply 'shut it off' but soon I'll still go to bed after another day of struggling to get him out of my head.

It's something you can't see, it's my entire reality.