I Lost My Dad Today

by R. K. Wolfe

I lost my dad today.
He didn't pass away, but he is still gone.
He's gone from my life because I chose it that way.
I chose to walk away from the abuse he carries with him every time I am in his presence.
I lost my dad today because he made it that way.
He pushed my boundaries beyond repair.
He was supposed to hug me, love me, be there.
Sometimes I look at my phone waiting for him to call, but I know he wont.
Its not fair.
Its not fair I learned to love you in the beginning.
To only be let down in the end.
Its not fair that I still love you even in the storm of abuse you throw at me.
Its not fair that I have to lose you.
but I do.
If I don't you will kill me, and I know it.
Abuse is abuse and your love isn't love.
So no,
no matter what,
You can't be around anymore.
I lost my dad today.